Bird Emergency (Originally Posted 7.12.07)

So I'm running down the street toward the park in my neighborhood last night, and up ahead, I see four police officers and maybe 20 people standing around in the middle of the street. I slow down and pop out my headphones ... but nobody's really saying or doing anything, and a lot of people are looking up. The Triborough Bridge is up ahead across the street, so I'm wondering if maybe there's a jumper ... But there doesn't seem to be any activity on the bridge, so I keep going.

Four miles later, I'm headed back home, and now there are about 10 police officers, several police cars (many with their lights on) and probably 100 people gathered on the same corner, still looking up. There's a bit more action this time, so I decide to hang around for a minute to see what's going on. Long story short, it turns out there's an injured red tail hawk in a tree on the corner.

Now. If this had been most anywhere else in the country, this wouldn't have been too big a deal. But this is New York, and not only is it New York, it's Queens. God bless my borough, but you kind of get the feeling a lot of these people don't get out too often. Like, they've probably been back to their home country a lot, but if they're in NYC, they don't get too far outside NYC. And God bless the cops in this town because they are wonderful and heroic and they do amazing things to keep us safe, but they have neither the equipment nor the know-how to capture wildlife.

Because this just devolved into one of the more humorous experiences I've ever had in this city. The people on the street were downright giddy. We had everyone from grandmas to teenagers on bikes to kids running around in the street, and people are calling the news -- actually discussing which newschannel would be the best to call. I heard a spirited debate behind me about whether Channel 11 or Channel 7 should be called to the scene.

And then there's the cops. We've got a guy on a ladder that's leaned against the tree. And he's got what I described to my roommate as a big metal finger on a stick. Like, the way you'd swipe your index finger under a parakeet to get him to hop aboard -- this was the big metal version of that. He's going after the bird with this thing, but the bird's not having any of it. He's hopping away further and further up the tree. So they decide to go the net route. Except the net is on a stick that's not long enough. So ladder cop passes the net back down, and all's quiet for awhile. I'm wondering what exactly is going on when another cop emerges from an *emergency management* truck with two nets, lashed together with electric tape to make a longer pole. Awesome!

So Ladder Cop's back poking at the bird, and the people are getting all riled up. Word on the street was that this had been going on for three hours, so this was some serious action. The bird falls down a few branches. People scream. Ladder Cop goes at the bird again, trying to scoop him into the net. People think he's got him. They begin to clap. But the bird's resisting, and he falls completely out of the tree.

At which point all the cops on the ground ... stand there. Seriously. It was quite hilarious. The bird starts trying to make a break for it. He's hopping toward the fence in the yard he fell into. People are screaming. The cops finally start moving. The bird hops up and over the fence and INTO A VERY BUSY STREET!!! And now he's running across the street with the cops in hot pursuit and all the people on the street close behind them. That nobody -- bird, cop, or pedestrian -- got run over in this whole ordeal is a rather significant miracle.

Unfortunately, after all this buildup, the end of the story isn't particularly interesting. The cops finally caught up with a bird, they threw a sheet over him, and then stuck him in a box. People cheered. The cop walked triumphantly back to the emergency management truck with his box 'o bird. People followed him across the street like he was the Pied Piper. And I don't really know what happened after that. I guess we all went back about our lives. But it's fun when you live in a city where you expect to see literally just about anything at any time of the day, to see something you didn't expect to see. It turns out there's a whole nest of red tail hawks in the park in my neighborhood. I'll have to check them out the next time I'm down there.